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Messages - Lumaria

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General MM Discussion / Why I've been gone
« on: September 28, 2019, 12:09:49 pm »
So many reasons why I've disapeared for a while was focus on my comic. And I've learned a lot of things with working with a team.

It also helped that this place got a little quiet over the years to flat out dead. So I have no idea who is reading.

One of the things that helped was that american comic companies have accepted newcomers more recently.

But these companies care a lot more about the panel-by-panel drafts than the scripts.

I've been reading other drafts too and seeing how they ink compared to Japanese companies.

I may return to my old stories and see if I can improve them with this new perspective.

Art Gallery / Re: [+18] Gemstone Gallery
« on: September 12, 2018, 12:18:29 am »
I'm going to give you the whole story because why not.

That picture was made for a completely open ended project aimed entirely towards expression. I mean we weren't graded on technique, and it didn't even have to be a drawing. It has to do with me trying to understand who I am. What I'm trying to portray is very complicated. The woman in the picture isn't a real person but she's based on the girl mentioned in that story I posted here, "The Cannibal". Red hair, red eyes. However, I wanted her to feel very human and natural so the red in her eyes is dulled down and her teeth aren't sharp.

You are looking from my perspective and that is my hand drawn resting on the plate. When I drew this piece I made it under the pretense that anyone who looks at it could easily be the girl or me. It deals with these two sets of carnal desires. First there's this woman who is obviously beautiful and young and friendly. This sense of attraction doesn't seem so crazy until you see what someone is willing to do to satisfy it. Secondly it's her desire to consume you. In a way, they're the same, the lust towards her flesh and her lust towards yours.

Obviously this extends beyond flesh, and it really has nothing to do with that. I has to do with really the abuse of others for your own gain and allowing yourself to be abused for your own gain. One day I watched myself switch places until I became the cannibal and I destroyed a friendship. I deceived him until I was able to get what I needed. I felt sick afterwards.

It was so natural I wouldn't have ever noticed had I not drawn that image and forced myself to deal with the darkest parts of who I am. So as I said, I drew this under the pretense that anyone could be the girl or the viewer, but now I don't think that's entirely genuine. What's certain about this picture is that I could easily be either person.

I wanted this picture to help me look into the minds of the people who've hurt me or abused me physically or emotionally in some way and so I was forced to take into account how exactly I was responsible for putting myself in a position to be abused. Because when I did that, things started to make more sense, and I was able to humanize the people who hurt me. Naturally you want to demonize them, and in the same way I wanted to demonize the girl, literally. This is the second version of that image and the first one she had sharp teeth and was just all around more vicious. It turned out much more powerful when I made her more human because a monster is what you're expecting.

This is the exact same thing that the cannibal as a story is based on. I didn't know that when I wrote it. It wasn't a conscious decision, but a subconscious one. The one that I posted is not the first rendition of the cannibal. I first wrote it when I was around 12 years old, and I kept making changes to the story and pushing this grotesque and horrific story and it wasn't until recently that I understood why I was obsessed with this character.

sounds heavy. i'm sure plenty of us have drawn something similar to that. i definitely think that drawing was the one with the most symbolism. the others appear to be more projects or practicing. SO its more interesting when you share drawings where you incorporate specific ideas or themes.

Manga Gallery / Re: Broken
« on: August 30, 2018, 10:40:55 pm »
The art I like.
The story I have seen so many times.

As for the masks. Where do you go with it that hasn't already been done? For masks we've had universal faces, big fake smiles, no faces, smooth faces, glitched faces, morphing faces, etc. (demons faces would be a slightly different piece or slightly different flavor to this one) you could have the masks quickly swapping between the people as they try to act like other people to be accepted.

Looking at the lack of options for something new I say stylize the masks heavily in your style.

if this was supposed to be an original series, you'd be right. this looks more like a test of skill and execution rather than see who can come up with the most original idea. its clearly just a one shot.

but it would be nice to see each mask show something different. that way when he gains his mask, we can see what face he chooses.

Manga Gallery / Re: Broken
« on: August 22, 2018, 01:06:22 am »
If this was done last month, then i definitely would recommend looking into other forms of shading. i think crosshatchings tyle doesn't work for every panel. Or at least a better technique to crosshatch.

Art Gallery / Re: DBNext's Art Gallery
« on: August 22, 2018, 12:53:47 am »
I see. well i'm interested in it and see where you go with it. Your story reminds me of Life is Strange, but i'm sure you're not going to go for the western hipster character archetype since you are highlighting an (Ex) cop.

Art Gallery / Re: DBNext's Art Gallery
« on: August 11, 2018, 07:15:05 pm »
so this is an intersting idea. IT definitely has a seinen vibe. It feels a little on the western side, but seinen have delved into those themes in the past.

I dont know how finalized those scenes are, but from what i can see, i recommend making sure the characters muscles are consistent and what kind of impression you want him to have. It changes a little too drastically between pages.

Page 1, he looks a little scary and menacing, in page 4 and 6, he looks depressed and hopeless, and in page 7 he looks drunk. I don't deny that you intended all of those aspects onto the main character. Its also a little early to tell, there is probably more panels to show.

Manga Gallery / Re: Broken
« on: August 11, 2018, 07:08:51 pm »
i can tell this was a little older and you are more capable now than in the past, so i wont go too detail in some of the issues. I'm also aware the competition had a 10-page limit. There were probably other limitations you had. So i'll review it as if you intend to remake it. (also i have a feeling i've seen it before)

So far its good considering the limitations already mentioned. My main concern is that it wasn't so obvious that the people were wearing masks. He sort of had the ability that he perceives fake people to being something non-human.  I'm personally not a fan of the mask design, but that's not criticism, just adding in my input.

And i may be entirely wrong that its not a mask. So if I'm wrong, you can clarify.

It was hard for me to relate to him just by having his heart broken for seeing someone he didn't know with someone else. It would be more relatable for me if he actually met this person. There is a little bit more room to expand on this even for 10 pages if you are good with panel organizing. For example,  pages 2 and 3 can be merged into a single page, and have a new page dedicated to how they meet and starts to fall in love with her through interaction. (just an example)

I don't know how much of the crosshatching style of shading you use now, but if you are still using it, i recommend looking for other methods of shading to expand your style. You probably didn't have access to screentones or photoshop back then, but i do recommend a little bit of both. It was definitely inconsistent of the main character to have this white shine on his hair for multiple scenes. For example page 1, his hair could've been solid black and the other male character in page 6.

When it comes to rain scenes, lots of manga have different approaches depending on what fits their style. Some manga artist use white ink over black backgrounds, and some use screentones designed for rain. And some do exactly as you did, draw individual lines and grey background (usually screentone). For this manga, since its just a single panel, the rain doesn't have to be so thick. And again, since its just a single panel, i would also recommend the rain not cover too much the background characters as well, just like the main character.

I like the idea of seasons passing by, but make sure you make background characters fit the environment they're in. So if the main character has an umbrella, the other characters in the background should as well. Or maybe show one running with a newspaper above their head.

Lastly I'm sure you are aware of this but i recommend using a different pen for characters in the background for scenes where the main character isn't relatively close to them (or shown connected to be near them). anything with thinner lines to show how much they blend in the background.

This issue is mostly with pages 2, 3 and 5 have this issue a bit. (although page 5 has the issue of not highlighting the female character properly as well). As for page 1 where the main character is actually part of the group and connected to it, i still see layers of that group. The closer the characters are, the cleaner and precise the lines should be. Their outline tends to be thicker as well to show they're closer. So i would definitely clean up the lines for the two characters that are covering up the main character.

Do you intend on remaking this? I think it would leave aa stronger impact if you did. Its definitely a good for 10-page manga competition.

Mini-Tokyo / Re: FLCL Progressive doesn't understand FLCL (classic).
« on: August 08, 2018, 03:15:47 am »
The depressing part is that many people defend FLCL Progressive due to thinking the original is overrated.

my main issue with chapters moving forward is organizing them properly. The setup with the followin gthree episodes is that they feel too stand alone for my comfort and i want them to be more connected and show the pacing progress rather than to alter.

So i'm reviewing them now and see if i can expand on them to add more that makes them feel like they're progressing.

Mini-Tokyo / FLCL Progressive doesn't understand FLCL (classic).
« on: August 06, 2018, 08:17:08 pm »
One of my all-time favorite animes out there is FLCL. So when i heard FLCL 2 and 3 were going to release, i was very skeptical. Not only was the original team not involved, but the original artist was available and they didn't want to take him in. Regardless of how i felt before it released, i was optimistic and it looked like the new team had a lot of passion for the series. So i still wanted to give it a chance. After I finished all 6 episodes of FLCL, here are my thoughts:

Its not a bad series overall, it definitely has an FLCL vibe, but it never feels like it expands on anything or grows from the original FLCL series, just puts more on top of it without knowing what its actually doing.

In some parts, the series definitely tries to imitate FLCL classic, and in other parts the series things its expanding ideas that FLCL already but its really not. So in this review i'm going to go into detail on what FLCL progressive got wrong or not as well as the original. Of course, spoilers. So if you haven't seen the series, i recommend you do.

#1) Story and Characters
What made FLCL really interesting was how the story was complicated on multiple aspects that took time to decipher.

There were concepts like N.O., Atomsk, Medical Mechannica, and Robots coming out of peoples heads if they met the right qualifications (and i'm making it sound crazy intentionally as that's how its suppose to feel at least on a first view). But there's also the complicated relationship between Naota and Mamimi, his friends and his family. Nothing was ordinary despite Naota narrating. And it wasn't that those aspects of the story were random, they were just told at a different pace. But it wasn't like the series felt like it was intentionally vague about it, it was due to

Trying to decipher both aspects of the series at the same time was part of what made FLCL so rewatchable. In Progressive, its completely expendable. The story doesn't feel worthy of watching again. In both the crazy supernatural and the social aspects of the series, they weren't that compelling or interesting or worth investing in. Characters like Hidomi Hibajari  were typical Tsundere, but not because she had something interesting about her to hide, that's just the way she was. Ko Ide was just a ladies man who happens to get all the girls and is secretly is poor making ends meet. And the way they portrayed the town that these characters lived in, just didn't feel as real as the town that Naota lived in.

None of them suggested or hinted that there was a complicated history between them or characters. They had relatively basic lives. Which really just didn't make it entertaining at all to watch whenever i expected something to suggest these characters were more than what they seemed and never coming close. Don't get me started on Ide's friends.

and the worst for last: Haruko. The sole returning character and they messed her up badly. IN the original, she would sometimes speak randomly and tries to play some sort of rhyming game, she never was as obnoxious as she was in FLCL progressive. Her tone was completely different from the original, trying to constantly sound obnoxious as possible. The biggest mistake that they got wrong from Haruko was that even though she was manipulative, she never "brainwashed" anyone to getting what she wanted and yet thats exactly what she did in this series. She tried to brainwash Ide and Hibajiri's class in the most obnoxious way possible.

Another problem with FLCL Progressive is that it completely misunderstood Haruko's relationship with Atomsk. In the original, it was only referenced that she was in love with him by Commander Amarao. But if you picked up on the clues, it wasn't about romance. What Haruko really wanted to do was to "eat him". This was referenced multiple times in the series when she hit Naota's head she would scream "lunch time!" and get angry for Naota for eating him when she said he was the only one to eat him.

FLCL Progressive doesn't reference that at all and sticks with what the creators interpreted. Which is a real shame.

#2) Sense of Randomness
One thing FLCL Progressive tries to do is push for a sense of randomness just like classic did. However, it does it in the wrong ways. FLCL Classic just really had the right level because in some areas it was using animation changes, and in other areas. FLCL Classic never pushed random moments as part of the story, only in minor scenes. Anything that "seemed" random was foreshadowed early in the episode.

FLCL Progressive did some random things and made no sense or tried to really foreshadow them properly. in FLCL Classic, Amarao's organization felt like a real secret government-based organization trying to take out Haruko and Medical Mechannica but in FLCL Progressive, they are trying to make a giant robot out of an amusement park. And it never made sense as to why or how they were able to do that. When they do attack the Medical Mechannica plant, it just shoots giant mocchi and turns people into mochi as well. And the secret weapon was a secondary character who turned into a plant. And once again, it never really made sense as to why or how its possible.

#3) Music and animation
The music is what i was looking forward to the most when it came to the series. And the Pillows absolutely delivered. However, the biggest mistake this series did is that it didn't choreograph scenes to certain action scenes properly. Actions scenes in FLCL progressive played the music not as loud and the scenes wouldn't go with the action and sometimes they would cut off the songs prematurely. It was irritating to see. The only times they didn't do this was for the brand new songs.

FLCL Classic would also play the music in the background even without big action scenes, but the scene would always end before the song would. That is important because the song would linger and it left a bigger impression. If FLCL Classic didn't do this, i wouldn't think that the pillows would be as big as they are now.

At the end of the day, i'm just disapointed. i don't hate the sequels, but i knew what i was getting into when i saw the trailers. Did anyone else feel the same way about FLCL progressive? And is anyone looking forward to FLCL Alternative?

Mini-Tokyo / Re: Steins Gate 0 - review
« on: August 03, 2018, 05:42:22 am »
I haven't watched the beta episode since it wasn't available on VRV. I was able to follow along after a couple of episodes though. I'll rewatch it after its completed. The latest episode was decent and pushing toward a direction (even though at this point the direction is still unclear).

i prefer watching it in the English dub (with a few exceptions such as Mayuri being my favorite in the Japanese dub).

Mini-Tokyo / Re: Steins Gate 0 - review
« on: July 28, 2018, 06:37:36 pm »
I've theorized in the past that Steins Gate: 0 is using the alternate timeline of the future Okarin. Which would explain Steins Gate: 0's name. I did however wanted to leave that theory out in case that it was a major spoiler.

There are many moments in the anime that felt convenient that i feel are the use of actual time travel. I just have no enjoyed the pacing.

I've not played Steins Gate: 0 and I'm sure you're right that the anime is handling it better than the game. The reasons why i like the original over 0 is that it was a breath of fresh air. It was just experimenting with ideas that seemed interesting and worth looking into. The way time-travel was handled was very entertaining.

I understand that visual novels push possible romances. I always enjoyed Steins gate for always fully establishing a concrete single romances even though there were others who liked Okarin. So it bothers me in the anime that they are faithful to this.

I'll wait and see until it ends, I'm sure it'll change my mind about it. The reason why i wrote this review however is because i didn't want to forget the negative feelings the anime currently has given. It could also be that i finished Steins Gate in a single viewing while i have to wait for Thursday for a new episode. So when the episode doesn't live upto my expectations, i feel a little cheated.

But i dont think that's wrong in this case because i haven't understood what is actually going on, or what themes its trying to push for. too many side-stories are intertwined and difficult to really pick and choose. These characters also have this horrible trope of "not sharing their information with each other until its too late".

Mini-Tokyo / Steins Gate 0 - review
« on: July 28, 2018, 04:25:42 am »
So i've been watching the Steins Gate: 0 on VRV. And as much as the name suggest it is a prequel, it is actually a sequel to an alternate ending of Steins Gate.

The anime isn't complete but i felt i had to give my thoughts about it now considering how vastly different it is from the original. There is going to be spoilers for original Steins Gate, so if you havent watched it, please do so. Or play the game.

Quick summary review of the original Steins Gate:
Story follows a college student named Rintaro Okabe who he dubs himself as Houiin Kyoma (i spelled it the way its pronounced, not the way its intended to be spelled), a mad scientist and a little child like by renting an apartment and calling it Future Gadget Laboratory. His two friends are Daru and Mayuri who are also lab members. Mayuri also calls him Okarin.

When attending a lecture, he meets a young famous scientis, Makise Kurisu and witnessed her death which him to accidentally time travel when he informed Daru by text while Daru's phone was attached to the phonewave (Phone operated Mircrowave) attached.

This leads to a series of events where Makise Kurisu survives instead of dying and helps Okarin and his friends on developing a time-travel method by sending text messages into the past using the Phonewave. The timeline gets altered timeline where inevitably an organization known as SERN attempts to hunt them down and Okarin's childhood lovable friend, Mayuri. In order to save her life he has to find a way to undo all of his previous actions when they sent text messages to the past by sending new ones. Which lead to final decision of allowing Kurisu to die.

However the game ends with future-Okarin giving a message to present-Okarin on instructions on how to preserve both Makise and Mayuri's life.

As ridiculous as it sounds, the anime executed it very well. The visual novel goes far deeper into the pseudo science. Its almost hard to keep up with what they are saying in the video game.  I also paraphrased a lot and there is much more involved then what i mentioned.

The biggest strength in the anime is how interesting the characters are. Not one character bore me or made me feel disinterested. It takes a slow but progressive pace, not one episode is wasted and explores either characters or time travel. The video game also made a huge effort to explain otaku-culture. I'm not sure why, but considering the game was originally released in 2009 and otaku-culture wasn't as big as it is now, i can see sort of see why.

Steins Gate 0 however takes place in a timeline where the final decision was to allow Makisu Kurisu to die. Okarin is now dedicated to his studies in college and has become successful however he is still scarred by Kurisu's death.

The biggest mistake this series does is make Okabe (who was once a lovable and energetic main character) into a boring normal and overly depressed character. I'm at the latest chapter and so far he does absolutely nothing to move the story forward. All the other characters around him seem to be doing a better job at progressing the story.

The story still tries to paint him as the main protagonist, but doesn't really do a good job. He is incredibly sluggish and sometimes there are moments where he should be more cautious but isn't.

In addition to all of this, there is a forced romance with this new character that used to be Makise's old friend. A few character push for this romance and it doesn't feel appropriate considering that Okarin eventually had feelings for Makise and the feelings were returned.

SO far, i dont know what this story is trying to do. The first anime had a set of themes that were clear. The second title doesn't know what it wants to be. Its just a continuation and feels like a what-if situation.

My thoughts may change after the anime ends. I have also not played Steins Gate: 0 so there are other details i may be missing.

Art Gallery / Re: DBNext's Art Gallery
« on: July 28, 2018, 03:38:05 am »
I'll look forward to reading them.

Art Gallery / Re: DBNext's Art Gallery
« on: July 28, 2018, 03:21:13 am »
Have you been working on any stories in particular?

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